Hello!

We are in Winnipeg! The last two days have felt like two weeks here. They have been long, packed to the brim, exhausting and fun. Yesterday we did 3 shows. It looks like Kevin and I will be doing regular shows on the outdoor stage performing in "Improv Idol". Outdoor shows can be hell but so far we have been having fun with it. Then last night we had our first show of Scratch here. It was a good, solid show for a house of about 35 or 40. We had a dragon, an asteroid, time travel, assless chaps and more in the show. And finally we performed in The Big Stupid Improv Show with our friends Lee and Steve from the Crumbs and Rene from Atlanta. And let me just say, it was a blast. Some of the scenes were so damn funny none of us could keep a straight face resulting in many slaps from Kevin (who was directing the particularily funny scene). I can't wait to do more of them.

Tonight's Scratch was a little bit crazier than it usually is but we had a really supportive audience which was nice. We had two reluctant western outlaws, a first time stripping waitress, a tractor that ate cities, Oompa-Loompas, hats made out of pasta and more. It will keep us busy doing these extra shows and it's certainly nice to get to hang with some cool people like the Crumbs and Rene and Robyn and Toby and you know, other peeps.

On a negative side, we had our first poor review thus far. It was from a CBC guy and basically his criticism was based out of the fact that he didn't believe it was improvised....o..kay....

I'm also a little bit anxious for the next few days. I auditioned for Stratford a couple weeks ago, then had a callback last week and I am supposed to hear about what's happening any day now. We'll see...

To the rest of the Young Guns...I salute you. Hope you guys are all rocking like a hurricane.

9 shows down on this crazy Fringe tour of ours....9 left till we come home. Wish us the best for the last half!

Take care all!

Love,

Arlen

Hello You,

Once in several lifetimes an actor is born that forces the entire movie industry to rethink film as they know it. Those is the movie business, or “the business” as they call it in the business, can feel the “Christ-esque” aura that this actor exudes when plying his or her craft while weaving storyline, plot and characterization into a braid of movie magic. It’s true that there are awards that are given to those actors that conform to “the academy’s” view of greatness. But there is a second level of acting supremacy that some, so called, method actors attempt to obtain by drawing on life experiences and staying in character for the entirety of a films production. “Nice try” I would say, “but there are things you will never do” I would follow up with. For example a movie called “The Child Killer”, good luck finding a studio that will hire a method actor for the lead in that movie. Sucker. Life experience needing sucker.

But I digress. It is my opinion that we, as the movie going public, are currently bearing witness to the next “God of Acting”. You may have already seen him in a number of Independent classics or Blockbuster hits and not even realized you were watching the savior of film. His movies include Galaxy Quest, Joe Somebody, Big Trouble, Christmas With The Kranks, The Santa Clause (1, 2 and 3:The Escape Clause), and the Insta-classic The Shaggy Dog. My friends, allow me to introduce to you, again, for the first time… Tim Allen, in his newest cinema masterpiece, Zoom.



“But Mr. Julian Faid, that idea seems very similar to X-men and The Fantastic Four?” You might say. Well Fine, but consider this counterpoint: “It isn’t similar. Discuss”

“But Mr. Julian, are they not simply cashing in on the Super Hero trend that is so prevalent in movies today?” You may also ask. To which I would say “No”, to which you may then ask for an explanation, but I would ‘shush’ you. As I would no doubt be watching this movie and therefore improving myself as a person.

I implore you to do the same. Improve yourself by taking in all you can at the Church of Allen (i.e, South Common) and bring the family, even grandma, but make sure she pays full price and doesn’t accept the seniors discount. That way she will improve as much as the rest of the people that see… Zoom: The Passion of The Allen.

Bravo Tim, Let's get this party started indeed.

Julian

P.S. It's great to see that Child obesity doesn’t have to be a bad thing like the media would have us believe. This movie shows it can be a super power if used correctly. However, if used incorrectly, it will result in daily bullying from those with a normal metabolism. Take your pick fatties.

Mystery Solved.

Sorry 'Question Mark', no need for you here.

Jules

Well, we're almost out of here. The Toronto leg of our tour has been very successful on all fronts I feel. It has been a lot of fun being here. I am a little bit exhausted though. On Friday Kevin and I were guests on the Uncalled For gangs show after doing a show in the afternoon. I had a lot of fun performing with them and the crowd was hot...plus their bus is really sweet.

Then, last night we had our grand finale of Scratch here in Toronto....and we nailed it. It was definitely one of our best shows of Scratch. And to top it all off...we had a sold out crowd! There were even people turned away. Plus our old friend Jar Jar Binks made an appearance in the show. All in all...a job well done.

Now tomorrow we chill out a little bit then it's off to Winnipeg. There is a rumour I might actually see Stephen Kent tomorrow but it's not confirmed. I'll keep you posted. He is one shifty mother.

Winnipeg ahoy! And chips ahoy!

Arlen

I might not be in Washington D.C. representing Alberta, and I might not be touring my Fringe show across Canada. No, I'm changing the world in our own backyard. I'm in Bragg Creek Alberta supervising at a camp called YouthWrite.

I spend my day (which begins very early and ends very late) hanging out with the campers (kids 11-14 years old this week, 15-18 next week), who are so talented. They are poets, they are singers, they are artists, they are authors, they are the future of the artistic world. And when I am not with them I am hanging out with the instructors, world famous singer/song writers, authors, poets and artists. There are too many to name and their cumulative talents are too wonderful to describe, but they amaze me every day. When they teach, I want to teach like them. When they share their creations, I hope that the creations that I (and the Young Guns) share mean as much. And I would of course be nothing out here without the people I work most directly with, the other supervisors and our lovely coordinator. Again, I won't do names, although I could since there are only 8 of us, and we do the work of 80, but their constant support is what gets my up in the morning, keeps me going all day and is what draws that eleventh wind out of me at 1:30 a.m. and we dance all night. Then we do it all again the next day, and the next and the next.

So, the reason why I haven't been as good as I should be with this blog in the last week, is because this is my second oppertunity to access the internet (thank god it was still open at 12:45 a.m.) so after sifting through dozens of e-mails, this was the second stop I made.

Anyway, if there is anyone reading this out there, I apologize for the cheese, but I needed to put my thanks and appreciation somewhere out there in internet land for people to read and perhaps know what I am talking about.

And to my Young Guns, rock your shows, whether they are Scratch in Tdot or the titty-po in E-ville. I will rock our nightly improvised show: the Beeg Show. So far the reviews are good, but they have to be, so I can't lose.

Okay, I think this is my fourth conclusion paragraph so this one better end this freakin' blog update.

Joe

Good it did.

HEY!

Today we arrived at our venue to find out that the air conditioning was broken. Now, I don't know if you have seen Scratch but this is one of the worst things that could possibly happen. On a good day when the air conditioning is working Kevin and I still end the show absolutely drenched in sweat after running, jumping, rolling, fighting and generally throwing ourselves around the stage. So with no air conditioning we were already feeling the heat after our warm-up. By the end of the show I was literally pouring sweat. It was running off of me and dripping onto the ground. Yikes. I hope they have it fixed for the last two shows.

At last nights show another reviewer came, this time from the Toronto Blog. He also brought a camera and documented the show. His review can be found here. And some of the first pictures from Scratch in Toronto are below, with the rest being on the Toronto Blog site.

Two more shows here in TO! Wish us luck!

Love,

Arlen

I'm Back....


Mark was attacked by an Elephant. He called it fat. A day this elephant will never forget.


Ummm.. No Thanks


Me and our biggest fan!


This was our hotel...or something...


I had my hair straight one night. So i joined this small band named "The Beatles". They'll never amount to anything.


Mark was on FOX News. He was cut off the second he began talking about anything containing truth.


My buddy George and I shared a few laughs. Me: So i hear 3 Brazilian soilders were killed in Iraq yesterday? George: Oh my god! That's horrible! Me: well, it sucks but compaired to the thousands of... George: How many in a Brazilian?

So that's my trip! we did 24 hours of improv in 10 days in Mid 90's heat with 80% humidity. I almost quit improv. But hanging with so many talented people was awesome and something i will never forget.

Time to get back to business. See you on Friday for some home town improv for the only audience that really matters. Forget you american tourists!

Piece.

Jules

See Arlen, the mystery Young Gun is right. You're not the only one doing shit! jeez....

We got another review this time from the Toronto Sun. Here it is:

SCRATCH

(HELEN GARDINER PHELAN PLAYHOUSE)

Truly great improvised comedy makes you wonder if the players are really spinning this stuff out of thin air, or if they've got cheat sheets stashed up their sleeves. But Edmonton improv wunderkinds Kevin Gillese and Arlen Konopaki are the real deal, and their ability to conjure laughter from the thinnest of premises is comedy voodoo. It's never the same show twice, naturally, but even on a night when not all their cylinders are firing, there are more laughs per minute here than in most scripted Fringe comedies. And when they're truly on their game, watch out. Hospitalization-worthy hilarity. -- Steve Tilley

Our house on Saturday was about 3/4 full, so hopefully word of mouth will continue to grow and push our audience to new heights. Our next show is today at 4:45, wish us luck!

Arlen

Today we went to Canada's Wonderland. Oh. My. God. It was a lot of fun. I have to admit I get fairly scared when faced with crazy rides but I was surprised how much I handled today. That being all the most extreme rides there were. We got there early and very first thing Mo, Kevin's girlfriend Allyson and Allyson's roommate Andrea headed for the TOP GUN ROLLERCOASTER OF DEATH. I believe it was the most intense ride in the park. Kevin and I were quite apprehensive (actually Kevin started crying so badly he had to be sedated by security) but evenutally we just went for it and really pushed it to the max. Once on the ride, as we began our slow climb to the top before dropping I was wishing so bad that I hadn't actually gotten on the ride. I was asking myself why...why did I do this? But then the ride got going and it was a lot of fun and I was fine. After that I felt I could handle anything so we proceeded to tackle such monsters as THE TOMB RAIDER, and THE ITALIAN JOB, and THE VORTEX and my personal favorite, THE BAT.

A couple funny things. As I was riding THE ITALIAN JOB SPEED RACER ROLLERCOATER FROM HELL I almost blacked out which is funny enough in itself but there was a lady sitting behind me with her two young kids and the whole time we were riding it she was swearing up a storm yelling, "Fuck! Shit! Shit! Fuck!" and so on. Then when we finally stopped there was an exchange that went a little something like this:

Lady: Fuck. That was horrible. Fuck that was worse that the last fucking one.
Little kid: But Mom! Didn't you find it fun at all?!
Lady: No! It was fucking terrifying.

I thought that was really funny. Also to defuse some of my intense nerves on the scary rides Kevin and I did this bit (which was admittedly stolen from a Montreal improviser we saw on Monday) that went a little something like this:

(As rollercoaster is climbing before drop of death)
Arlen: La la la...what a lovely day! Why nothing could possibly go wrong. I feel as though I'm on top of the world! Nothing could - (rollercoaster drops) OH MOTHER OF GOD WHY!?!?!?! WHY LORD IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME!?!!? OH GOD I'M IN HELL! I'M IN HELLLL!!!!!

Our next show is at 11pm tommorow. We are hitting the handbilling hard tommorow to try and pack the show. Hopefully the reviews will help a lot with that as well. Wish us luck! I'll keep you posted!

Love,

Arlen

Hey!

Well it has been a hectic last few days trying to get everything ready for our opening which we had last night. The house was small but the show was really great. There were two reviewers there from the weekly magazines and both are already out. To read the review of Scratch from NOW MAGAZINE go here. To read the review in Eye Weekly go here. The Eye review is a little bit down the page, the shows are listed alphabetically.

If you didn't feel like clicking the links and reading, well we got 4 star reviews in both of them! We don't have another show till Saturday so hopefully we can get some good word of mouth going and handbill some more people. Yay! We're doing it! We're really doing it!

Arlen

PS: That arrow next to Scratch in the NOW means we are one of their "Picks Of The Fringe".

Alright, so I've been harassed by Arlen and Julian long enough and finally the guilt has gotten to me, so I will blog. But I am not heading off for weeks of fringe shows, and I am certainly not representing an entire province in the United States of America's capital. No, for me life right now is in boxes. That's right, I'M moving! Down 12 stories, 5 blocks away and up another 12 stories. There were many reasons for the move, but that is not what I want to tell you about. What I would like to tell you about is how I think the moving process is stupid. An example. My girlfriend and I had to be out of our old building by noon on June 30th, but the soonest we could take possession of our new place was July 1st, which means for that evening of the 30th we were homeless. Now, fortunately for us we have family in the city that could put us and our cat up for the night, and I suppose if you didn't a hotel or motel for one night wouldn't be so bad right? Well... what if because of a lack of moving vans in this city for rent you actually had to move out on June 28th, then it is three days you would be homeless. But then what if the new building you are moving into couldn't actually move you in until the 3rd because the apartment you are moving into needs 36 hours of labour to restore it to prime condition and all the moving elevators were booked up. Well, then I guess it would be 5 days you were homeless. But then what if U-haul said you couldn't keep their truck for five days, well, then I guess you would have to unload all the stuff from the truck into your girlfriend's parent's garage and then on July 3rd load it all back on and then over to your new place. But then what if on July 1st when you went over to inspect your new apartment you found that the walls were beautiful and carpets were nicely steam cleaned but the hardwood was simply destroyed, and the landlord told you that it should have been done by now, but with it being a holiday weekend the hardwood people probably wouldn't make it in until Tuesday, July 4th. But wait a minute, you were supposed to move in the day before, but you can't do that when there will be a crew in your apartment the next day using toxic chemicals. So now what do you do? Well, I suppose you put off your move until Thursday, July 6th. So now, instead of being homeless for one night and only needing a moving truck once, we need the truck two times and we have no apartment for 8 days. Now again, we are lucky to have family in the city who are willing to put up with us for that long, but what would you do if didn't? Well, I guess you would continue to live in a hotel, and that would certainly start to get expensive, and what would you do with your cat? Well, I guess you would have her put up in a kennel, but that too would start to add up.

I guess I will just count my blessings and hope that on July 6th our apartment is finally ready.

Some picture from my trip to D.C. ENJOY! more to follow....



I was glad to see this revolution. It's about time those christians took the reins of western society.


Here are some old people that i liked the look of. Horde that water old man!


The swedish chef! YES!


The flag from the Pentagon...Red, White and BORING!


A good question. This is why i put my name on my horrible inflictions, so if i lose it, someone will send it back to me!

Any uber-american picture you guys want to see? Or any picture at all? I'm taking photo requests!

U.S. eh? U.S. eh?

Jules

Hello!

Tommorow I head out for the month long Fringe tour of Scratch. We are in Toronto until the 18th and then to Winnipeg for the rest of the month. I am a little bit nervous and very excited. I feel ready to rock the house. These last two weeks have been busy prepping all promotional stuff and making sure everything is in order and now all there is to do is jump on the plane and do it up! It will also be fun chilling in Toronto these next couple weeks doing a couple of Catch 23 shows and hopefully watching a baseball game. I'm also gonna try and make a trip to Stratford to see the long lost Young Gun Steve.

Losing Will is on hiatus until I get back and then the first two weeks of August are gonna be crazy finishing everything off. Oh boy! Then of course all the post-production that will still need to be completed. August shall be packed to the brim!

But now I have to finish packing and get a good night sleep. Wish me luck! I will post when I can and let everyone know how the shows are going.

Take care everyone! I will see you in August!

Hugs and kisses from me to you!

Arlen


PS: ALSO TD! I miss you.